Listen to Your Heart

A couple of weeks ago, I had a bit of a health scare. At just 37 years old, with perfect numbers and no family history of hearth disease, I was experiencing brief, yet sharp pains on the left side of my breastbone regularly.

I’d felt them before occasionally, starting last Fall, but they’d been increasing in frequency and were becoming more worrisome. After noticing them one day for well over a minute, I finally called Kaiser, who wanted me to come in ASAP to be seen.

I still don’t know what’s up – could be GERD, could be an inflammation of the ribcage; neither the doctor nor I have ruled either out – but the experience made me stop and ponder. What do I really want out of life, and how am I going to get there?

An even bigger question is where do I want my focus to be? My eight-year-old recently joined Boy Scouts and has finally been assigned a one-on-one aide to help him though the school day. My career is moving along, albeit maybe not to the full extent that I’d like. I’ve become a Competent Communicator at Toastmasters and am also a club officer. Finally, I made some headway towards my physical fitness goals a while ago, but had to pull back due to sheer lack of time to exercise (which I still manage to squeeze in once or twice a week).

Ultimately, I think our time on earth is best spent with those we care about and who love us back. For most people, this means family, although some have such dysfunctional relatives that this is not necessary or advised.

Nor must you include your entire family in your trusted circle. Over the past year, I’ve absolutely lost faith in several people and will have to decide how to proceed. This happened again just last week and I won’t give details here, but I’ve been composing a response, in my head, to this person for a couple of days and am about to give it to them straight.

One of my new favorite shows lately is The Big C. I like it because it’s both funny and heartwarming, and touches on this very topic. Cathy’s family is far from perfect, but beneath the layers of dysfunction lie a group of individuals who would do just about anything for each other.

When you’re facing the ultimate big question of What does my life mean, how do you go about finding the answer?

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This entry was posted in Family, Just Rambling and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Listen to Your Heart

  1. Pingback: Dysfunctional Family Values (During the Holidays) | Personal Essays

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